Do you get stuck in your head about your pole progress?
Do you sometimes have an adversarial relationship with pole?
Do you wish you could feel like a more successful pole dancer?
Let me reassure you, if you feel this way, there’s nothing wrong with you. It’s not your age or your shape. It’s nothing to do with the classes you take or the instructors you train with. You just need a better strategy, one that trains the sexiest and most important part of a pole dancer’s body first.
The mind.
But before we can train your mind, we first have to understand your mindset. I started pole dancing in 2013, got my instructor certification in 2015, and started teaching regularly in 2016. Since then, I’ve seen a lot of limiting beliefs get the best of some wonderful pole dancers, and I’ve done battle with these mindsets myself.
What are these four very common, but limiting mindsets that can hold pole dancers back? Let’s take a look. Brace for an attack!
1. Shoulding on Yourself
Meet Shonda. Shonda has always been active. She loves going on hikes. Shonda has been doing yoga for years, and she generally enjoys fitness and movement. Shonda signs up for pole dance, thinking, “Why not? I’m fit, and pole dance looks kinda easy!” But Shonda gets upset during her first class because she’s not used to the awkward feeling that can come with being new at something-- especially something she assumed would be easy and thought she should have mastered right away.
2. Onto the Next
Meet Chase. Chase has set a goal to be able to Butterfly. Chase has saved a bunch of #pdbutterfly videos on Instagram, watched a few tutorials, asked her instructor to teach it in class, and will not rest until she can Butterfly. Chase precariously holds a Butterfly while the instructor quickly snaps a picture. Chase posts the picture to Instagram, and immediately moves on and starts thinking about the next trick she wants, which is Ayesha.
3. Forgetting Why You Started
Meet Fiona. Fiona started pole dancing because she wanted a different kind of workout, one that didn’t feel like exercise. She signed up for pole dancing because it looked like fun, and it didn’t hurt that it was a little sexy too! Five classes later, Fiona leaves the studio frustrated because she messed up a few times on the choreography the class was working on.
4. Perfectionism
Meet Patty. Patty is determined to climb to the top of the pole. She thinks, “If I could do that, I’d be so proud of myself!” Patty comes to class, puts in the work, and finally climbs to the top of the pole! Then, as soon as she touches the ceiling she says, “Yeah, but it wasn’t pretty. My feet were flexed.”
Okay, now it’s time to look inward. Whose mindset do you share?
Are you a Should on Yourself Shonda?
An Onto the Next Chase?
A Forget Why You Started Fiona?
Or a Perfectionism Patty?
Maybe you are more one than the other, or maybe you are a little bit of everyone. Maybe you are a different mindset than one of these four. A Comparison Cathy perhaps? I’d suggest that if you compare yourself to others and feel you don’t measure up, there’s a sneaky “should” feeling in there. If that’s the case, you can call yourself a Should on Yourself Shonda because you tell yourself you should be like that other person.
It doesn’t matter which limiting mindset speaks to you the most; the important thing is to identify the mindset or mindsets you share. Because now that we have identified the mindsets that are holding us back, we can start to do something about it.
Read the next blog post to get actionable strategies for how to change these mindsets and start crushing your pole goals. Want to see what The TRACK Method is all about? Check out The Ultimate Pole Goal Notebook.