Why does it seem like motherhood and polerhood go together so well? Maybe the pole community brings out those nurturing vibes. Maybe it’s the magic of menstrual synchrony. Or maybe it’s because a ton of polers got pregnant during the COVID lockdown!
Sarah Scott, owner of Off the Pole Ltd and mother to a baby girl, says she’s still pretty new to the whole “poling mum” thing, but thinks “in general it’s great for her [daughter] to be around music, dancing, and to see her mum being active and strong.” Amy Hazel, owner of Blackbird Studios and mother to a baby boy, is grateful to pole dance for not only keeping her fit and active, but also being able to play with her son and have the arm strength to hold him for long periods of time.
Although Sarah and Amy are literally a world apart—the UK and Australia, respectively-- both started poling long before they had their babies, and both agree that the hardest thing they face as mothers who pole is time. Amy says, “Given the COVID lockdown and no family support around me, I barely have any time for myself. It takes a lot of effort to just get to the studio!” She considers it a blessing to have enough time to warm up and do the basics.
For Sarah, it’s about efficiency. “I used to have these long training sessions where I’d spend time procrastinating and playing around,“ she says. “Now I have to be as efficient as I can. I also sometime have to dodge an ever-more-mobile curious child if she’s with me at the studio! It was hard at first, but you adapt to the new routine.” She feels like she gets a lot done in a short space of time now simply because she has to. And you know what they say: having to is the mother of invention.
Sarah Scott and Amy Hazel were world famous pole dancers well before they became mothers. Sarah started in 2008, won Pole Theatre UK Pro Drama in 2015, and took first place at Miss Pole Dance UK in 2012. Amy started in 2010, took first place at Pole Theater Classique HK in 2015, and won Miss Pole Dance Australia in 2018. What about the people who found pole after motherhood?
Time is still a big challenge, of course, but believe it or not, so is the sex factor.
Pole is sexy (duh), but for some moms, it can feel weird with the kids around. Tobin Crosby loves the sexy side of pole dance, but with three boys always around, especially a 12-year-old, she feels the need to be more conservative. “I don’t feel comfortable wearing small clothes, heels, or fishnets with them around, “she admits. “I feel the need to protect them from comments or judgments made by their friends or friends’ parents, so I keep a lot of things off social media.” She never wants her boys to be bullied or excluded for having a pole dancing mom. For Tobin, maintaining the balance between mom and sexy poler is something she’s constantly aware of.
Jillian Weddeke, mother of two, on the other hand, doesn’t sweat it. “If I can be a MILF, you can too!” she quips. In the end, I know Tobin’s only sweat is at the studio. “There aren’t a hundred naked women running around my house with my kids,” Tobin jokes. She knows she’s doing what’s right by her boys, and she can’t control what others think or do. “People form their own opinions anyway,” she concludes.
They sure do.
Despite the various challenges, mothers like Sarah, Amy, Tobin, and Jillian continue poling because they believe it makes them good role models for their children. Find out just how in part three.